doctor visits
this week i took a break from traveling and decided to fix everything, if anything, wrong with myself so i made an appointment with the dermatologist and the dentist. the dermatologist for the cysts on my legs (they don't look quite as scary as they sound- really), and the dentist because i hadn't seen one in about 2 years.
so my first visit was to the dermatologist on 19th and 5th. the office turned out to be really swish- clean, spacious, modern and minimalist. it felt like i was visiting the plastic surgeon's because i saw an older lady who was obviously there for her weekly botox shot or maybe yearly facelift. hmm.
wait my turn and finally get shown into a sanitary room with frosted glass doors. wait some more while i read a brochure about atypical nevus which are possibly skin cancers and wonder if any of my moles could be atypical and cancerous. the doctor finally comes in and he looks buff and well kept under his scrubs - kind of like that plastic surgeon on Dr90210. show him my cysts which he told me were harmless and in fact i could google "dermafibroma" to find out more about my affliction. i told him they did not hurt but had grown from when they first appeared (fede told me to say that so that everything would be covered by insurance and i did). so i will be getting them removed two weeks from now. i've never really had a procedure performed on me and i am sure it will be very strange.
a couple of days later i went to the dentist. dentists must have such a laugh behind their face masks because they get to stick all sorts of stuff into your mouth to pry it open in weird positions and watch saliva collect in puddles in your cheek. he took some xrays and cleaned my teeth with some kind of superfast spinning device which i thought he was going to drill right through my teeth the way he was going. you don't even know how many freak scenarios ran through my mind those 5, maybe 10 minutes of cleaning because you have absolutely no idea what the dentist is doing while your mouth is cranked open. i imagined he was sharpening away and giving me pointy teeth; i imagined blood spewing from my gums if he only slipped a millimeter, missed my teeth and the drill plunged into my gums instead.
as if that wasn't horrific enough, he then lit up the xray films and pointed out 3 cavities in the back of my front two teeth! i thought cavities were a problem of kids, not a 24 year old who brushes twice a day!! and how fucking strange is getting cavities in my two front teeth??????
a couple of days later i went back to get the cavities cleaned and filled and this time it was even scarier because as he drilled, all these miniscule particles were flying out of my mouth, and i couldn't tell if it was water or enamel dust. i won't even mention how fucking painful the anesthesia jabs were.
the next day i am drinking a can of diet pepsi through a straw like i do every morning and my front teeth hurt because the straw ends right behind my two front teeth. suddenly it became clear how i got those cavities! now i have to figure out how to
drink soda without sipping it through the straw in the middle of my mouth or turn to coffee as my alternative caffeine source which will turn my teeth yellow. so which is the lesser of two evils??
so my first visit was to the dermatologist on 19th and 5th. the office turned out to be really swish- clean, spacious, modern and minimalist. it felt like i was visiting the plastic surgeon's because i saw an older lady who was obviously there for her weekly botox shot or maybe yearly facelift. hmm.
wait my turn and finally get shown into a sanitary room with frosted glass doors. wait some more while i read a brochure about atypical nevus which are possibly skin cancers and wonder if any of my moles could be atypical and cancerous. the doctor finally comes in and he looks buff and well kept under his scrubs - kind of like that plastic surgeon on Dr90210. show him my cysts which he told me were harmless and in fact i could google "dermafibroma" to find out more about my affliction. i told him they did not hurt but had grown from when they first appeared (fede told me to say that so that everything would be covered by insurance and i did). so i will be getting them removed two weeks from now. i've never really had a procedure performed on me and i am sure it will be very strange.
a couple of days later i went to the dentist. dentists must have such a laugh behind their face masks because they get to stick all sorts of stuff into your mouth to pry it open in weird positions and watch saliva collect in puddles in your cheek. he took some xrays and cleaned my teeth with some kind of superfast spinning device which i thought he was going to drill right through my teeth the way he was going. you don't even know how many freak scenarios ran through my mind those 5, maybe 10 minutes of cleaning because you have absolutely no idea what the dentist is doing while your mouth is cranked open. i imagined he was sharpening away and giving me pointy teeth; i imagined blood spewing from my gums if he only slipped a millimeter, missed my teeth and the drill plunged into my gums instead.
as if that wasn't horrific enough, he then lit up the xray films and pointed out 3 cavities in the back of my front two teeth! i thought cavities were a problem of kids, not a 24 year old who brushes twice a day!! and how fucking strange is getting cavities in my two front teeth??????
a couple of days later i went back to get the cavities cleaned and filled and this time it was even scarier because as he drilled, all these miniscule particles were flying out of my mouth, and i couldn't tell if it was water or enamel dust. i won't even mention how fucking painful the anesthesia jabs were.
the next day i am drinking a can of diet pepsi through a straw like i do every morning and my front teeth hurt because the straw ends right behind my two front teeth. suddenly it became clear how i got those cavities! now i have to figure out how to
drink soda without sipping it through the straw in the middle of my mouth or turn to coffee as my alternative caffeine source which will turn my teeth yellow. so which is the lesser of two evils??
posted by jia en at 5:46 PM
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